Dreams and Nightmares

1:30 a.m.~I am sleeping peacefully having a lovely dream...in the distance I hear something...something that's not quite part of my dream...what is that? "MOMMY!!! I'M AWAKE!!!"....again I hear it...."MOMMY I'M AWAKE!!!!"....again "MOMMY!!! I'M AWAKE!!!!"....I think I hear it several more times before I realize what in the heck it is...I throw myself out of bed all the while thinking "why is Megan not bringing her to me?"....I get to the hall...OHHHH what's that terrible stench? I get Hannah out of the top bunk...it's not her I smell....what is it? I search Megan and Hannah's room...(Molly went to bed with Megan). It's not there...I think I must be imagining it...I go out to the hall, I am not imagining it, it reeks!! I turn on the living room light. There's Molly in her crate. ...she is surrounded by poop, it's all over her, all over the crate. What in the world??? Megan must of put her in the crate during the night. I go wake up Aaron, he'll have to either hold a screaming Hannah (she's very attached to her mom right now) or give the dog a bath. Aaron is not a happy camper...he's grumbling and mumbling...It's one thirty in the morning..here I am giving a dog a bath...I leave Hannah in our bed and go to assess the damage...eeeuuuuuwwww...pooparama! I clean it up...oh the joys of dog ownership. I go back to our bed...here's Molly...all happy, she's just had a bath and now it's time to play....Molly goes to bed with Matthew. Now I'm wide awake and so is Aaron and so is Hannah. Hannah begins to scream..she wants ALL the blanket, she doesn't want to share with anyone. It's time for Hannah to go back to her own bed. "Mommy read a book"..."no, Hannah, it's bedtime"..."MOMMY!!!! READ A BOOK!!!!"....I tell Megan I'm sorry and close the door...then listen to 20 minutes of screaming "MOMMY!!!! READ A BOOK!!!!"....I go in, she has not settled down. I tell her I will sing one song and then I'm done, no more songs. "Sing Child of God"...I sing it, kiss her, say good night. "Mommy, sing twinkle little star". "Good night Hannah". I again tell Megan how sorry I am...I offer for her to go down and sleep on the couch in the family room, she declines, and I close the door...20 minutes of more screaming!! "MOMMY...SING TWINKLE LITTLE STAR!!!!!!", over and over again. Is this really happening, perhaps I'm having a nightmare?...Aaron and I are wide awake watching TV at 230 in the morning!! Finally, we can stand it no longer...it's 3am...still screaming, screaming, screaming...Aaron gets her.....brings her to our bed..."does your ear hurt sweetness?"..."NOOOOOOO!!!!!!" says the monst..I mean sweet little girl. She insists she needs her pink cup and her pink hat. I go look for it, I can't find it...Aaron goes, he finds it behind the door in her room. She calms down after a few more tantrums over the blanket....she's cradling her pink cup and is wearing her pink hat. "Daddy, I want to go to my own bed"....."okay!"...she goes to sleep in her own bed while Aaron and I watch a kitchen remodeling show on food network. It's 4 a.m. when we finally fall back to sleep only to be awoken again...someone's walking around the living room....Aaron goes to check it out only to find Zack..fully dressed ready for seminary getting ready to eat a bowl of cereal...."Zack...you don't have to leave for another hour and a half"..."oh, I thought it was later"....he goes back to bed. My alarm sounds at 5...time to make sure Zack's up. Oh, forget it...I'm too tired. Zack misses Seminary. Later.....11:30 am, at the doctor's office...Hannah has an ear infection...I am actually happy to find this out. Please let this mean that my sweet girl has not been replaced with a demon child. Oh, the joys of motherhood! (and fatherhood!)

Another one of those things

Instead of sending this out to everyone I know.....I'll just put it here.

(X) Gone on a blind date

(X) Skipped school
(X) Watched someone die
( ) Been to Canada

(X) Been to Mexico

( ) Been to Florida

(X) Been on a plane

(X) Been lost

(X) Been on the opposite side of the country

( ) Gone to Washington , DC

(X) Swam in the ocean

(X) Cried yourself to sleep

(X) Played cops and robbers

(X) Recently colored with crayons

(X) Sang Karaoke)

(X ) Paid for a meal with coins only?

(X ) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't?

(X) Made prank phone calls

( ) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose

(X) Caught a snowflake on your tongue

(X) Danced in the rain

(X) Written a letter to Santa Claus

(X) Been kissed under the mistletoe

(X) Watched the sunrise with someone you care about

(X) Blown bubbles

(X) Gone ice-skating

( ) Been skinny dipping outdoors

(X) Gone to the movies

(X) got a speeding ticket

1. Any nickname? Kimbalino, Kimmy, Ber, Berber, Kimmers

2. Favorite drink? water

3. Mother's name? Kay

4. Tattoo? yep

5. Body Piercing: Ears

6. How much do you love your job? depends on the day

7. Birthplace? San Antonio, Texas

8: Favorite vacation spot: Currently: The Beach

9. Ever been to Africa ? No

10. Ever eaten cookies for dinner? Yes

11. Ever been on TV? no

12. Ever steal any traffic sign? No

13. Ever been in a car accident? Yes
14. Drive a 2-door or 4-door vehicle? 4 door

15. Favorite salad dressing? homemade vinaigrette

16. Favorite pie? dutch apple..one of my favorites..I pretty much like every kind of pie, except mince meat

17. Favorite number? 7

18. Favorite movie? Return to Me...among many, many others

19. Favorite holiday? Thanksgiving

20. Favorite dessert?anything chocolate

21. Favorite food? again I say, anything chocolate, I also love love love hot wings

22. Favorite day of the week don't really have one

23. Favorite brand of body wash? anything from bath and body works

24. Favorite toothpaste ? Crest

25. Favorite smell? the air outside after it's rained and the smell of a newborn baby

26. What do you do to relax? read...

28. How do you see yourself in 10 years? Maybe I'll be a grandma....I hope we'll be in our own house and settled

Boys go to Jupiter to get more...well you know....

Can I just say...thank goodness for all the wonderful women and girls in my life. I love my husband so much but sometimes he's just such a boy!

The latest

I think Spring is finally here...woo hoo! I'm loving the sunshine and all the green. Joe, Hannah and I went to the park for some fun with moms and their kids from our ward. It was so good for all of us...even if I did get a little burn on my arms.
Thought I'd post some of our latest pictures.
It's Hannah Banana....she is outside with just a pull up on. Which is actually unusual for her. She loves to wear anything pink and any dress. She tells me she's a princess when she's wearing a dress. She loves the new water table we got. I would highly recommend having a water table for all those little ones who love and I do mean love water. Hannah no longer pulls chairs up to the kitchen sink to play in the water...now she has her own little "bath" as she calls it. Today she came in and told me there was a "buggie in her bath"....she wanted me to come out and get it out of there.

Joe loves blowing bubbles.

We (Aaron) painted our living room. It turned out nice...only a couple spots on the ceiling that need touch up. Aaron worked so hard!

Zack was Father Christmas in his high School play..He did such a nice job, it was fun to watch!

Four Things

I received this email from two friends in the past two days so I thought I'd just post it here on my blog.

Subject: Four Things

Four things about me that you may or may not have known, in no particular order:

A) Four jobs I've had in my life:
1. Manager at Victoria's Secret
2. A collector at a law office
3. substitute teacher
4. MOM :)


B) Four movies I would watch over and over:
1. It's a Wonderful Life
2. Jumangi
3. Return to Me
4. 13 going on 30

C) Four places I have lived:
1. La Palma, Ca
2. San Diego, Ca
3. West Valley City, Ut
4. Lincoln, NE

D) Four TV shows that I watch:
1. American Idol
2. Medium
3. Lost
4. The Office

E) Four places I have been:
1. Mexico
2. The Redlands
3. Turks and Caicos
4. Idaho

F) Four people who e-mail me regularly:
1. my friend Rebekah
2. my mom, Kay
3. my friend, Lia
4. my sister, Jenny


G) Four places I would rather be..... VISITING
1. Beach
2. a remote cabin in the woods
3. Turks and Caicos
4. a quaint bed and breakfast with Aaron


H) Four friends I think will respond:
1. ?
2. ?
3. ?
4. ?


I) Things I'm looking forward to this year:
1. Our trip to Branson, Missouri
2. running a half marathon
3. the kids being out of school for summer
4. our trip to San Diego for Aaron's reunion

Home is where the heart is, or so I hear.

When Aaron and I married a little over 16 years ago we made a big move from California to Utah. I left all my friends and family behind to start a new life and a new family. Almost immediately I was sooo homesick! I missed my parents, my friends, my nanny kids (I was a nanny when Aaron and I married), and most surprisingly I missed my sister terribly!! Jenny and I had fought so much during our growing up years that I had no idea how much I really loved her....it seems funny to say that now...I just love her so much! I think the most frustrating thing about this time was how much my husband did not understand this. He did not have any homesickness. He can be happy wherever he is, this is NOT something we have in common. Time went by and first my brother and sister in law moved to Utah from California and I had a new wonderful friend and sister in Michelle....we were pregnant with our first babies together......we became each others ally in the Schafer brother kingdom. She is such a wonderful person and even though we've had our rough spots, I know we will always be sisters and friends. My sister, Jenny eventually missed me so much she moved to Utah. I missed her more than she missed me, I think, and she just moved because I begged her to. We lived in Salt Lake area for 14 years and during that time we had many wonderful moments along with many trials. I had so many good friends that I still have today. Right after the birth of our sixth baby we moved to St George, Utah. Oh, how homesick I was!! I missed my family and friends more than I felt I could bear at times. I made so many trips up there that a four hour drive began to feel normal to me. Then when I finally felt like I could begin to have a life again, we moved once again....this time to far far away Nebraska. Although I felt so happy for my husband...(he was promoted).....I was nervous. We got here and I felt fine. I didn't feel homesick! I felt welcome in our new ward and started making friends right away (something that didn't happen in St George for many months). My kids were adjusting well, except for Matthew but that's another story. Then a few weeks ago I took a long hard look at myself in the mirror. I've gained quite a bit of weight...my first sign that something is not right. I don't feel like going anywhere or doing anything, another sign that something is not right. I am homesick! I thought I'd dodged the bullet, but I haven't. Luckily I know I'll feel better eventually and until that time I will just keep on keepin on....I did do something for myself today...I bought a runners magazine. Running is something I started in St George and it helped bring me out of the funk...now that spring is FINALLY starting to arrive I think I can start running again. I have a good 8 week plan to start with and I am hoping to be able to run the half marathon in KC in October. Next year I hope to be able to run a marathon. I have much to be thankful for, my kids are healthy, my husband has a good job, we have many many blessings. I just need to remember that.

The Beady Beader

So, my sweet daughter has decided she would like to join us out in cyberspace. She asked us to set up an email account for her. Josh was nice enough to do this for her. When I asked her what her address was she told me it was beadybeader@blah blah blah..(I'm not giving it out here, if you want it you can email me for it). This is such a fitting address for her. That girl LOVES to make jewelry! She's been beading for around three or four years now and she's quite good at it. She has a very creative mind and much patience for it. She knows so many techniques and is not afraid to try new things. She makes bracelets, earrings and necklaces for her friends and for her family members. She loves to have her friends come over to make things with her. She has even been asked by her teacher to make a necklace that she will be paid for. She has set up a road side sale a couple times too. She already has plans to open her own little shop when she grows up. Of all of my children I believe she will be the one to make this work for herself..she is very ambitious! I can remember when she was around five years old one the neighbors called to ask me if I knew she was going door to door selling her old toys...of coarse I had no clue! She has always loved to make a buck! I just love how independent she is and how much she loves being her own person. I do wish she "needed" me a little more, though.

A Few Things About Me

1. My favorite color is dark blue...I also love purple.

2. I have a very addictive personality.

3. I am a very open person and have a tendency to over share.

4. When I was younger I always wished I had an older brother.

5. I love loud music and many times when I've been alone in the van I've turned the volume all the way up! No wonder my hearing is failing!

6. I HATE onions.

7. I love sweets..especially baked goods and candy, reeses peanut butter cups are my favorite....love heath bars too!

8. I gave birth to my first five children without an epidural, I also had a midwife, Sandae, (she's awesome!)...had a C section with the last one.

9. I sometimes feel very inadequate.

10. I slept with a stuffed dog named "Peaches" until I got married.

11. I love feet.

12. I love to watch Medium, Lost, The Office, Scrubs, and American Idol.

13. I have seen every episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer at least once and many of them two or three times, or more!

14. I have never had a broken bone (except for my toe..twice).

15. I am not a decorator and have no idea how to decorate my house!

16. I once forgot to get Joe out of our van and left him in the dark garage for a half hour before I realized he was out there....he was so scared and I felt like the worst mom in the universe! In my defense...I thought one of the older kids had gotten him...

17. I like to tease my kids, we once teased Zack with a fuzz ball that he thought was a bug for over half an hour...I know, mean!

18. It really bugs me when people are not tolerant of others....

19. I LOVE babies....I'll bet that's surprising..ha ha

20. When I was young...I wanted to be a mom and housewife or a teacher.

Let's talk about Zack.......Again

Okay, I know I keep bringing up Zack...it's just that he is growing up and I'm sad and happy all at the same time. He's in the high school play and he's been gone so much the past few weeks and I miss him. Last night was the dress rehearsal for the play and the kids families were all invited. Our family went and the kids all did so good at sitting still and watching. The only irritant and it was actually really cute for us but maybe irritating to others...was that Hannah talked through the entire thing. Many of the ensemble were animals....so Hannah would yell out...there's a a kangaroo....or....there's a bad dog right there......or..... I see the Lion!...She seriously talked through most of the play. Zack remembered his lines and did a good job. After the play he came out and gave me a carnation, all the kids did this, for their parents. Although he was standing with us, his mind was not with us...he was looking around trying to find his friends and wanted to talk to them about how the night went. He's at this age where his parents are not the most important thing to him anymore. I was telling Aaron on the way home how sad I was and that I missed him so much. After dropping the kids and me at home Aaron went back to pick up Zack and must of said something because Zack came in and gave me a big hug and said "I love you mom, why don't you take me to school tomorrow"....Aaron usually takes him. So, this morning Zack and I got in the car to go to school. We stopped at Walmart to pick up some Claritan. We decided to sit and have some breakfast at McDonalds. We chatted and he asked me what I liked about the play and what I didn't like. He listened and didn't get offended, it was so wonderful. He told me about choir and other things going on in his life. I told him about the other kids and what they're doing. He missed first period at school, but who cares..............

The Pink Potty

Hannah is potty training!! She decided all on her own that it was time to use the potty. She kept going in the bathroom and taking off her diaper and climbing up on the toilet all by herself. Now this could be a real "cute" thing if poop wasn't involved in it. So, I decided to go all out and get a potty chair. We didn't use a potty chair with Joe but I decided I didn't want to be spending all day going back and forth from the living room to the bathroom for false alarms. So, I got her a pink potty chair. She absolutely loves the color pink....whenever she sees something pink she will point at it and say "that's my pink"....the other day she would not drink from the open gallon of milk because she saw that the unopened gallon had a pink lid and she wanted the "pink milk". I have say thank you to my older kids for teaching her colors. Getting dressed in the morning can be quite irritating for me...she will only wear pink clothes or "princess" clothes (dresses). So, back to the potty training....she's doing so good! She's only had one accident today, yesterday she had only one too. And she did number two today, all by herself, she went to her pink potty and sat down and went, all while I was on the phone! What a big girl! I'm so excited to think that we won't have to buy diapers any more! Girls are so much easier to train, in my experience anyway. Megan also trained herself...just decided she was ready. Now the boys on the other hand, they were all over three and so stubborn about the whole thing. It's so fun to have a girl last...what a sweet princess in pink she is!

Zack's 15th Birthday

Zack is officially 15 as of March 30, 2008. One more year until he is legal to drive...scary! We had a nice family dinner. We had homemade chicken cordon bleu, a salad and corn bread (Zack chose the menu). He wanted me to make a checkerboard cake with strawberry and chocolate cake mixes. My mom got me a pan set a few years ago to make checkerboard cakes. I have to admit this was my first try with it. It took a while to get it made but it was fun! Zack said it reminds him of Alice and Wonderland. I think he had a nice birthday! Megan got him a sleep mask with her own money. As you can see from the pictures he is a very funny person. He's getting so old and becoming his own man. We are really proud of him and his accomplishments thus far. He's a good guy!

My Promise to Myself and my Family

I promise I will never babysit on a regular basis again...unless it's for my grandkids, someday, a long time from now. That being said, today I am babysitting. This week I've been feeling quite sorry for myself, for a variety of reasons, none really worth mentioning. I was thinking to myself a couple days ago that I really do need to do something for someone else to get myself out of this funk. I may of even prayed for an "opportunity"....be careful what you wish and pray for.....
Last night the compassionate service leader in my ward called and she told me there was a less active sister in need of someone to watch her son for the next couple days. I have plans tomorrow but I committed for today. He is a cute little guy. He's just 3 weeks younger than Hannah. I have him all day today. He's pretty independent and didn't cry or anything when his mom left. I don't think the hard part is the other kids at all, it's my kids. They don't like someone coming in and taking over their territory. I'm sure having to share is good for them. That is what playdates are for. I just don't enjoy all the drama of hearing.....MINE, MINE, MINE...all day long. This is just a good reminder to myself that I am not a babysitter......I'm quite happy and content just being a MOM.